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[09 Jan 2004|03:43pm]

add me if you want. i'm not worrying about it. i'll be back every once in awhile.
5 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[07 Jan 2004|02:04pm]
things i learned today:

1. mixing greens is a no-no. who would have thought.

2. we have no food in my house. except for...nothing.

3. i'm just about fed up with everything.
5 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[06 Jan 2004|12:59am]
late night epiphany--

i've decided that from now on, i don't want to be friends with people who have a GPA higher than a 3.3 unweighted, as they will inevitably only make myself feel more worthless and mediocre.

secondly, all friends i have who are more attractive than me are cut. totally cut. this is definitely all for the best.

ok, back to bed!
2 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[05 Jan 2004|11:14pm]
i think it might be time for a new journal. what do you guys think?
3 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[05 Jan 2004|07:31pm]

i've figured it out. i am developmentally 3 years behind everyone else. so no, i don't understand anything. i probably won't. for a long long time. whatever. it jsut sucks feeling like a middle-school nothing while everyone else is already an adult. i want what everyone else has. or had. whatever. ughghghg

there must be something wrong with me.
4 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[04 Jan 2004|11:51pm]
some of the people i know just make me feel so dirty.
2 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[03 Jan 2004|12:11am]
is it sad that i get very serene and happy every time i hear the west wing theme song? it takes me to my happy place.
6 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[02 Jan 2004|08:38pm]
[ mood | indescribable ]

this song makes me want to run screaming through the streets at the top of my lungs. i feel jubilant when i hear it.

bang bang, baby.

[01 Jan 2004|09:02pm]
vacations make me really bitchy. oh well! hoes need to learn not to step!

i'm exhausted guys. remind me to never leave the state again. and no, celina and i managed to NOT get tired of each other over the week we spent in the mountains of DOOM.
4 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

EUREKA! [24 Dec 2003|05:56pm]
i finally figured out how i know that one scene girl jen stone!

i had seventh grade science with her back in the day at conway. one monday she came in and she had bleached her upper lip and the hair was all like, orange! soooo many guys made fun of her and me and yao felt really bad for her. because that's embarrassing. i remember going home that day and looking at my upper lip and then asking my mom to buy me some nair. and now me and nair are lovers. so that's how i know her. she had an orange mustache in seventh grade.


watch. somehow it's gonna get out that i told the whokle internet she had an orange mustache in seventh grade and all her scene whore friends are going to come after me and it's going to be super death. TOO BAD I"M LEAVING THE STATE IN TWO DAYS! CATCH ME THEN, DORKS!

ps, jen stone, if you're reading this, we can still totally be friends. drop me a line. oh yeah.
4 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[24 Dec 2003|11:54am]
there's no way i can pack for seven days. this is just absurd.
6 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

cats suck. [21 Dec 2003|01:26am]

but not really.
6 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[21 Dec 2003|12:52am]
TasteStilLingrs: hot hair
yo soy fagotista: totally
yo soy fagotista: i wish my hair was straight so i can do it
yo soy fagotista: damn curls!
yo soy fagotista: stupid black father!
bang bang, baby.

[21 Dec 2003|12:21am]
you are lightskyblue

Your dominant hues are cyan and blue. You like people and enjoy making friends. You're conservative and like to make sure things make sense before you step into them, especially in relationships. You are curious but respected for your opinions by people who you sometimes wouldn't even suspect.

Your saturation level is lower than average - You don't stress out over things and don't understand people who do. Finishing projects may sometimes be a challenge, but you schedule time as you see fit and the important things all happen in the end, even if not everyone sees your grand master plan.

Your outlook on life is bright. You see good things in situations where others may not be able to, and it frustrates you to see them get down on everything.
the spacefem.com html color quiz

now that's just creepy.
bang bang, baby.

[20 Dec 2003|10:17pm]
this perfume makes me feel SO pretty.
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[19 Dec 2003|12:01am]
i wish i had red sneakers. =(
bang bang, baby.

[19 Dec 2003|12:00am]
=O =O =O

this is incredible stuff.
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[17 Dec 2003|10:57pm]
i feel really manic right now for no reason. i'm so stressed out. i might have a breakdown tonight. and not in the totally siqq harcore way, either. PLEASE WEEK BE OVER
bang bang, baby.

he's my real dad. [17 Dec 2003|02:47pm]

i tell everyone i was named after an elvis song. veronica didn't come out until i was four but it's all the same to me.
bang bang, baby.

[16 Dec 2003|10:26pm]
um, seriously guys. all of my girlfriends can stop being so gorgeous now. it's really hindering my boyfriend finding abilities.
2 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

seriously. [15 Dec 2003|04:27pm]
today i spent an hour creating this from all my music....like, i picked my favorite favorite songs by each artist i had, the ones you can never ever skip because they just drive you crazy. and it just brought back so many memories. i want to call cait like right now because almost all of the songs are like, from sophomore year and summers and stuff when we used to be together all the time (and when we had nothing better to do than listen to weezer and think about how hot adam lazzara is). =( =( =( caitlinggggggggg. do you remember when we used to sit in the back of chem class with eva and carrie and sing those morbid saves the day lyrics during labs? and when we went to the beach and listened to nothing but the blue album and screamed the lyrics to surf wax america in the car? and how we analyzed the lyrics to how long is the night and you were (and still are) convinced it was inspired by that neil young song? remember when we liked the used? and when we would watch dashboard unplugged everytime i came over and just freak out? and of course, being the only one way letter fans in florida?

sigh. my playlist is the bomb, and yours isn't.
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[14 Dec 2003|03:55pm]
yawn. what a day, what a day. it's rainy.

over and out, connecticut.
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[11 Dec 2003|05:35pm]
i've been having weird dreams lately. i seem to fall in to this strange sleep and dream things that freak me out, but when i wake up i'm convinced they're real. two nights ago i thought one of my best friends hated black people with a passion and never told me. i got out of the car and walked all the way home and never spoke to him again. last night i was living in a house with celina and we went to the grocery store. and while she was buying fake flowers (for her) and orange creamsicles (for me), (side note: i think it's all too fitting that celina would buy flowers and i would buy popsicles. i mean, come on. think about our personalities.) i sat at a desk with an older but handsome man and he sung that "somewhere out there" song from that little polish mouse movie. and i fell in love with him because when he hummed, you could hear like, every note. it was beautiful. when i woke up, i still had that warm burny feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you want someone very badly.

all in all-- it's kind of cool, because it's like a new movie each time i sleep.

on the other hand, what if i'm clinically insane?

we're havign lasagna for dinner. oh, my lasagna. so good. with garlic bread, of course. bread is essential. atkins diet my ass. i'd rather be obese than give up bread.

today was chilly and i liked it. it was the kind of cold where you would stand in your sun and half of your body was cold and half of it was warm. i wore stilletto boots.

it feels like friday. i hate that. i always think i'm getting gypped.

if my english teacher had a livejournal, i wonder what she'd write?

celina. you, me, and emily should get our picture taken with santa on saturday. it would be so cute. caleb can come too, i guess. but i'm going home if i hear one nigger joke, i swear.
7 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[09 Dec 2003|04:03pm]
guys, seriously.
4 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[08 Dec 2003|11:09pm]
so i'm pissed off.

i have to do this makeup math activity shit because i missed a day somewhere, and it's on fucking wednesday afternoon. that's the gayest thing ever. what am i supposed to do, walk home? seriously, mrs. strickler. you can stop being nasty to me when ever you want. i hate math so much. like.....so much. i can't even fathom the hating.

so does anyone want to hang out wednesday afternoon after my gay ass makeup shit?

i got my gov book back form yao's, thank goodness. now i don't feel like a failure so much. tomorrow's goal-- finish all those damn test banks during p.e. and get them in. or find someone i can copy off of.

this saturday.....is crap filled. three different people want me to spend time with them and i feel obligated to all of them.

i hate being popular.

p.s. if you think you're intimidated by us, imagine how we feel. you're untouchable to us.

this song is so good.
bang bang, baby.

[08 Dec 2003|12:13am]
goodnight my babies.
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[07 Dec 2003|08:43pm]



bang bang, baby.

[07 Dec 2003|08:09pm]
another good weekend. see why i could never move away?

haha. it feels weird only seeing celina once this weekend. WHAT? we have separate lives? yes, it's true! (unfortunately)

have you ever just wanted to sit in someone's pocket sometimes, just so you can be around them like, forever? i feel like that a lot. i love my friends.

i need to write court case summaries for my government class. i love court cases. maybe i'll go to law school. or not.

everyone at cypress is having their senior skip day on friday. get it? 12/12? of our 12th year? i propose a senior skip day then for boone, also. we need the rest before exam week.

my NY vacation is supposed to go from the 19th to the 4th. can i go that long without seeing everyone? we'll see.

sigh. i need music.
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[06 Dec 2003|04:52pm]
mmmmm. chinese buffet.
bang bang, baby.

[05 Dec 2003|12:09am]

i went shopping on tuesday. i returned the too short pink sweater from cait and got this hot ass pink and orange striped one (so thanks again, babe. <3) and then a really really reallly crucial parcel bag that's shaped like an old school tape recorder. and of course, the piece de resistance-- 3 inch hot pink stilletos by chinese laundry. 14 fucking 50. beat that. they're amazing and they hurt like whoa but what's really important is that they're hot. i promptly took them home and applied a tiny tiny black star on each corner. they have to be seen to be believed.

remember, children. shoes make everything better.

today was like, unoffical best day ever day. at least for me. me, celina, true, adam, boat, norby, justin, mat, keith, kim, christina, and chet all went to denny's today for our senior breakfast. amazing times. true and adam built a space ship and the manager hated us. the waiter, brad was cool as hell and told us about he used to hide in his own trunk to skip from school. we left him a 20 dollar tip. technically, we were supposed to be back at school by thrid period. but since i like NEVER get to be a rebel (and i hadn't done my math hw) we decided to just...not go for a while. we sat in the parking lot of best buy for like 20 minutes and listened to hardcore and hung out, and then we went in so adam could buy a cd. clumsy me tripped over a display riser and totally scraped my foot open. the one freaking day i wear mary janes, i get hurt. and you guys wonder why i wear sneakers everyday. then we went to sam ash. true played the guitar while me and celina made some hot ass beats on the keyboards. i'm starting a band with celina. it's called GUNMETAL. GUNNNNNNNNNMETALLLLLLL whaaasaacasdj;jkk! that was me screaming. you had to be there. then target with kim to buy random snacks and chase true through the toy aisles. we ended up in a park by the airport an hour later, on a hill in the shade, eating and watching the planes go by, and playing on the playground. everyone should have days like that. it was amazing. we checked in 5th period. it was great. the three of us have the same class, so we all walk in and give ovie our pass and sat down. overton just looked at us.

the point: every once in awhile, you just need to be seniors and not go to school. and then brag about it.

but the real point: my friends are amazing people, no matter what everyone else says. yeah, they're lame and fake sometimes, but i love them anyway. and we have awesome adventures.

i'm addicted to The Darkness. i know. look, here's a whole post so you guys can ridicule me. but i'm also addicted to this old ass song by Gary Moore and Phil Lynott (not that any of you scene bitches would know who they are) called Out in the Fields. hot shit. it's like....all about Irish fighting and stuff. that U2 crap. because they're Irish. and Phil is a mulatto. that's right, Irish Mulatto. it's like me and caitlin had a son.
p.s. today i got REALLY REALLY good at the Can You Trust Me? game! soon i will surpass celina!
3 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[02 Dec 2003|12:29am]
omg. quit stealing everything from me.
3 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

OMG [01 Dec 2003|09:10pm]
[ mood | frustrated ]



i have to work on a project now. NO MORE IM'ING ME

2 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[01 Dec 2003|09:07pm]

sweet jesus. and stop IM'ing me over and over asking for them! i was WORKING ON IT AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

michaeldeleva1: i want pictures ho
yo soy fagotista: omg
yo soy fagotista: i have had ten people
yo soy fagotista: bug me all day
yo soy fagotista: about these fucking pictures

5 seconds later--

michaeldeleva1: where are the damn picture
michaeldeleva1: s
yo soy fagotista: ew
yo soy fagotista: i'm going to block you
yo soy fagotista: if you ask again
yo soy fagotista: i'm almost fucking done


birthday pictures, part one.

+18Collapse )
26 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[28 Nov 2003|06:12pm]
party info:

7:30 pm
my house-- 3117 ivel dr. 32806
call my house for directions
bring cd's and friends (and presents! )
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[27 Nov 2003|01:01pm]
oh man. the best smell in the world is a house on thanksgiving day.

i'm watching the dog show. if me and celina get an apartment, i wanna get a tiny puppy, and celina can have a kitty. because animals are awesome.

it's going to be very cold saturday night. like, low 50's. please come to my party anyway. and bring me lots of presents. just dress very warm!

i'm so hungry, but i don't want to eat. i want to save my hunger for later. god, you don't realize how much you love your mom/grandma's recipes until thanksgiving. so i'm thankful for yams with marshmellows and homemade gravy and mashed potatoes from scratch. and of course, egg nog and cranberry sauce (from the can, bitch i know where it's at)

mmmm. there's a pit bull that lives next door and he scares my mom. he scares me a little, too. but oh well. if he tries something, i'll shoot him.

i made a birthday list for my dad and the thing i want most right now is this sweet ass panasonic portable cd/mp3 player. it has these rainbow colored lights that flash to the music, and an awesome remote control thing and....ugh, so good. i almost asked for a new stereo, but then i remembered that i'm getting a new computer for college, and i can play cd's in that when i move to the dorms, so it's impractical to spend money on one now. word. WOOOOORD.

speaking of birthdays, happy birthday to my fellow Sagittarius, matt mendes. eat lots of turkey and then set some stuff on fire. and then come to my party on saturday!
4 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

still going to college [26 Nov 2003|04:15pm]
i'm bored guys. come on. let's do something.
bang bang, baby.

[26 Nov 2003|03:41pm]
[ mood | jubilant ]

hey guys.

i'm going to college.Collapse )

9 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[23 Nov 2003|11:03pm]
you know what i hate? having to pee and realizing BOTH the bathrooms are taken. i hate living with 4 other people sometimes.
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[23 Nov 2003|04:55pm]
and does anyone have any RED fabric/acrylic paint i could use? i forgot to buy red and white because i'm a total retard.

EDIT: nevermind, i can use yellow.
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[23 Nov 2003|04:34pm]
god, it's making me sick. disgusting little girls.

going to stencil now.
12 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[23 Nov 2003|03:29pm]
i'm sitting here working on battle of the bands documents and eating mozzarella sticks and it occured to me that i only have to go to school for two days this week. and that's mighty fine. my mom and i put our overly fake christmas tree up today, even though it's a little early. it's white. i think it's pretty. i wish i could convince her to do like, a mod theme this year.

party question, guys. the weather forecast for the night of my party is saying that the temperature will be at about 60 degrees, i.e, nippy. i love that kind of weather but if the idea of dancing and mingling in the fall climate is going to keep you from coming, let me know so i can open up a room in my house to hang in. come on people. fall is beautiful. the yard's going to be all lit up and beautiful...how could you want to sit inside?

i wonder what everyone's doing right now?
6 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[22 Nov 2003|12:04am]
i'm done with all of this LJ nonsense! i'm going to go read a book about the Evil Right and feel really liberal for awhile.
3 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[21 Nov 2003|10:47pm]
i forget how good my chemical romance is. like....they're SO good. they've really gotta quit.

i'm going to make a new background now.

EDIT: OMG SLASH FROM GUNS N' ROSES IS MULATTO? HOLY CRAP HE IS MY NEW HERO. all mulattos should really strive to have hair like that. i mean, i know I'M going to go buy a new comb and pick my hair out tomorrow. and a FUCKING TOPHAT.

EDITEDIT: oh man. i was trying to stop cursing. i suck so bad.
8 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[21 Nov 2003|10:15pm]
ew, i've totally wanted to call her like 86 times tonight over little shit no one else would understand.

but i didn't give in, because phone lines work both ways.

still. 8 years. what the hell?
1 hole through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[21 Nov 2003|10:10pm]
ew, now i know why i can't find my red chinese slippers.

they're totally in the backseat of christina's car. fucking a.
bang bang, baby.

[21 Nov 2003|09:57pm]
hey matt, boatwright's looking for you.
2 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[21 Nov 2003|09:07pm]
oh man. winamp internet tv is playing LS's in silence PV. so good.
5 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

[21 Nov 2003|10:39am]
staying home from school always seems really fun until you realize everyone ELSE is at school. so you're bored.

pout. and i can't go out tonight, either. oh well. someone bring me food.
bang bang, baby.

[21 Nov 2003|12:44am]
wow. i went to bed at about 1030 and woke up about a half hour ago with the most intense, non-PMS stomach cramps ever. i might be getting my dads stomach bug, which will suck. so if you don't see me tomorrow, call me. or bring me lunch. that would be uber sweet.
2 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

and now, my moment of zen. [20 Nov 2003|05:40pm]
drama drama drama. it makes the world go 'round. i'm so glad i have people in my life that make me feel like i'm the coolest person in the world. i don't think i deserve the treatment i receive. they love me so much and i really don't tell them enough. if your name starts with a C, i love you.

i will be hitting my eighteenth year of existence on a high note.

but i feel bad that people think so badly about each other that they feel the need to shoot such ugly words. i feel like i grew out of that stage where i just wanted to piss everyone off for fun; posting things in others' journals and pretending to not care what others' thought about me. i was always like that. "gee, guys, i'm the coolest. i'm amazing. i don't need anyone, and i could give a shit what you think about me." the truth is that i care a lot of about how my friends see me. it makes me want to be a better person. and i guess i'm a bleeding heart emo kid for that. whatever. the point? get over it. end this. most of you are seniors in high school. you only have 6 months left to leave the marks and impressions you want on others. after may, it's all over. you might not see any of us again. others of you are juniors. you make me feel very old. and very wise. that's sad.

issues are always resolved better when they're tackled in person.

to the person who posted on my journal anonymously earlier: i am very sorry that you know what suicidal feels like. good luck.
6 holes through my heart.| bang bang, baby.

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